LOADING DATA
Lo-Ruhamah
Members | |
---|---|
Jonathan Grant Griffin | Bass (2002-present), Vocals (lead) (2002-present) |
Harry Frederick Pearson III | Drums (2002-present), Piano (2002-present), Vocals (additional) (2002-present) |
Matthew Mustain | Guitars (2002-present), Vocals (backing) (2002-present) |
# | Discography | Type | Year | |
---|---|---|---|---|
1 | Lo-Ruhamah | EP | 2005 | Show album |
2 | The Glory of God | Full-length | 2007 | Show album |
3 | Anointing | Full-length | 2017 | Show album |
Lo-Ruhamah
Album versions
Release date | Label | Catalog ID | Format | Description |
---|---|---|---|---|
December 27th, 2005 | Bombworks Records | BWR0507 | CD | MCD |
Unknown | Independent | Digital |
Members | |
---|---|
Band members | |
Jonathan Grant Griffin | Bass, Vocals (lead) |
Harry Frederick Pearson III | Drums, Piano, Vocals (additional) |
Matthew Mustain | Guitars, Vocals (backing) |
Miscellaneous staff | |
Samuel Durling | Logo |
Douglas Wilson | Artwork, Layout, Photography |
Jess Heugel | Photography |
Melissa Sweeten | Photography |
Brent Young (R.I.P. 2020) | Recording, Mixing, Mastering |
Tracks | |||
---|---|---|---|
1. | Burden of Reason | 06:10 | Show lyrics |
Where is my strength? Where is Thy light? "Strength Through Submission" Where is my strength? Where is Thy light? "Sight by Petition" Must I cower to be strong? "Have faith dear child. Look what your own hands have brought" Frail; they break under the weight. Never to know their own power. Never to see their own might. Crippled knees from years of prayer, and the "counsel" to my ears. Where is my strength? Where is Thy light? "Strength Through Submission" Where is my strength? Where is Thy light? "Sight by Petition" Pleased by cowards’ fawning cries. We bow our heads beneath Your might. Why have we been formed this way? "What is the clay to question it’s potter?" "Be still. Know that power is Mine. Faith. The answers will come in time." Why impart cognizine, only to blind us and bind us to faith? Power elusive. Strength unknown. Is pride truly the cause of the fall? Or could my own will be a wellspring of might? Could the will of man be the one source of life? |
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2. | The Birthright of Cain | 07:19 | Show lyrics |
Abandon has come with the early breath of dawn. To where has the long shadow fled, leaving such regret? “The yoke is easy; the burden is light.” Then why has Thy council, silent, made me an amort son? Silent and lifeless. Voiceless and nameless -- You were never there. Have I only been blinded and bound? Holding to a promise that died with each gloaming? Father, scripts are burning still with words divine. The absence of Your comfort will leave me supine. Yeshua, how I yearn for sight To glimpse into Your eyes. Still, there is no reply. Silent, vast, and lifeless. Dry is my tongue, and vain are my laments. For neither solace nor grace will come of this petition. Only the silence speaks to me wisdom. The Voiceless brings my callous heart to rest. Silent and lifeless. Voiceless and nameless -- You were never there. Have I only been blinded and bound? Holding to a promise that died with each gloaming? Father, scripts are burning still with words divine. The shadow of Your waning will leave me supine. Yeshua, how I yearn for sight To glimpse into Your eyes. Still, there is no reply. Silent, vast, and lifeless. “The yoke is easy, the burden is light.” Such words echo hollow, distant and fading. You were always there. You were never there. |
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3. | In Mourning’s Arms | 01:34 | instrumental |
(loading lyrics...) | |||
4. | He Awoke and Came to Me While I Was Sitting Shiva | 06:34 | Show lyrics |
As surely as my heart fails, my love will come to me. My doubt will not prevail; my death cannot prevent Him. Oh, cowardice, how you take from me. (Or is it strength?) I know not. Truly I concede this. How beautiful that His Spirit returns for me, As elation brawls for dominion of my soul. Now I recall how I thought I found Him sleeping. But He was only still, And His eyes were filling me with strength prepared for death. Oh, cowardice, how you take from me. (Or is it strength?) I know not. Truly I concede this. I forgot that His Spirit was more than habitation. But how he kills my doubt before the loss can claim my life. I know the Spirit lives even in the blackest places. His love still weighs heavily upon my soul. |
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21:37 |
The Glory of God
Album versions
Release date | Label | Catalog ID | Format | Description |
---|---|---|---|---|
March 27th, 2007 | Bombworks Records | BWR0701 | CD | |
Unknown | Independent | Digital |
Members | |
---|---|
Band members | |
Jonathan Grant Griffin | Bass, Vocals (lead) |
Harry Frederick Pearson III | Drums, Piano, Vocals (additional) |
Matthew Mustain | Guitars, Vocals (backing) |
Miscellaneous staff | |
Eric Clinton Anderson | Artwork |
Rob Colwell | Mastering |
Brent Young (R.I.P. 2020) | Recording, Mixing, Producer |
Tracks | |||
---|---|---|---|
1. | The Cloud of My Soul | 02:19 | instrumental |
(loading lyrics...) | |||
2. | As We Walk | 06:50 | Show lyrics |
When have You called me child? When have You loved me? How can a father call his sentiment love when he stares so blankly from where he hides? Every thought in the cloud of my soul heavily hopes that You will prove to be real. All of my thoughts are tinted with longing, with yearning for You to reach me. I don’t want to find You--I want You to join me. I dream that we meet in the shaded spell of dusk as the trees glow with the lowering light of the red sun and rising moon when the Earth cools like the final breeze of morning. We meet as we walk on grass and soft leaves, and finally I know Your love because You have allowed me to see and to hold it. When have You loved me? I will know when You answer my call... |
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3. | Rose & Ivory | 10:09 | Show lyrics |
We remember Your name and the colors of Your breath (rose and ivory) and the taste of Your words in our mouths and the way it felt to stand in the steps of an unseen Spirit. And on the edges of sleep, we swear we can still see the shape of Your silhouette. Peripheral God, You dance at the corners of sight as we walk past You on a dead Earth. |
|||
4. | Shear-Jasub | 11:00 | Show lyrics |
If God will be silent, then so will His servant, for His lead is guiding the path I have chosen.... But what were the choices that brought me to birth? What human would claim we requested derision, or that we requested our hope to be faith? My eyes do not need menial validation, but faith needs a rock or a reason to live. Still, though I am aching for Wisdom, I have not severed the ties that retain me. I will not forget that the wise are blind. I wait for the Spirit we have still yet to know. In silence I wait beneath celestial sanctum, and if He comes, then I will speak again. (For then Your remnant shall return...) |
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5. | Torrents | 11:34 | Show lyrics |
In the writhing sea of Your love, I am swallowed. Black waves like starless skies wrap tightly around my body. Black waves: Your presence. And the roar of the breaking tide: Your voice (Yahweh) Drown me--I am lost without You Drown me--I lose myself in You The sea is ceaseless and the shore is gone, so I sink into Your deepness-- into Your depths am drawn. I breathe to die, so drown me. |
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6. | What Lines Reveal | 12:01 | Show lyrics |
Beckoned by the shadows, their familiar whispering of temptation (the ancient scourge) draws me. In a fallen state, where the sun grows cold, the last shafts of light close in around my feet. Hope is absent from this place--faith but a memory. Enticing shapes taunt with sweet notions, bidding me accept them. "Whom do you serve?" My mind retreats from such inquiries. "You are condemned; the former things are lost." Descend into the depths; the lines reveal the path of tears. Surely help will come; surely I will not be left. I pray my silent cries are heard, that He will come and lift me from my plight. The glory of God is found in pain, for it is the means by which He draws us near, unless we see ego behind His movements. Then a skyward glance comforts not. The world shrinks, and the windows close. This is my lot: human frailty, the kin of sadness. |
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7. | Regret Not This Love | 08:31 | Show lyrics |
Hope guides the days but so does despair, And You have left me with both (So my limitation is complete). I will not seek the end, for I know none exists. No beginning means no end: There is only existence. I am only a pulse, an atom in the ebb, And a form in the flow. When the sunlight recedes and the moon burns white I fell life cycle around me. Emptiness and comfort converge, And I see they are inseperable. How is life both nothing and beautiful? There is one love I will never regret Though my understanding is strained. I must strengthen myself to be content In the cutting winds of confusion. How will I trust? But how can I doubt? |
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01:02:24 |
Anointing
Album versions
Release date | Label | Catalog ID | Format | Description |
---|---|---|---|---|
May 19th, 2017 | I, Voidhanger Records | IVR072 | CD | Limited edition, A5 digipak |
May 19th, 2017 | Independent | Digital | ||
May 19th, 2017 | I, Voidhanger Records | IVR072 | Digital |
Members | |
---|---|
Band members | |
Jonathan Grant Griffin | Bass, Vocals |
Harry Frederick Pearson III | Drums |
Matthew Mustain | Guitars |
Miscellaneous staff | |
Damian Herring | Mixing, Mastering |
Francesco Gemelli | Design |
Elijah Gwhedhú Tamu | Cover art, Artwork |
Julie Griffin | Photography |
Michael Hylton | Photography |
Rachel Pearson | Photography |
Tracks | |||
---|---|---|---|
1. | Mouth | 04:17 | Show lyrics |
In the beginning I Was. And then I was Not, for I opened the door when death was calling. The sweet lure of a bitter taste. The mysterious lure of the faint taste of blood. The hypnotic pulse of a bright spot of light deep within the emptiness. And then the intoxicating delirium to wield a cosmic darkness. Out of the lure – a mouth full of blood. In the face of the light – teeth. Out of the wielding – being wielded and invaded. Teeth in my throat, poison-clouded thoughts, gasping for death. In the chasm, I am the Beast, and the Beast is within me. |
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2. | Sibilant Chorus | 04:18 | Show lyrics |
Against all wisdom and principle of life, I listened to a voice I ought never have allowed to speak. On the edge of a pit, I denied my Father’s voice and looked into the hole where I was told not to look. I heard the vipers hissing while yet far away, and drawing close, I called myself Master. Standing over the pit, the hiss rising to a feverish pitch: a symphony of grandeur. A mockery of death. A soulless chittering voice speaking in octaves all at once. Indistinguishable tongues of depravity singing the song of sensual emptiness. A glorious dream lifting up from a knot of serpents far below, hidden in the darkness. Leaning out, leaning in. Straining eyes searching for secrets. Ears entranced with amorous sounds. Leaning far, falling in. Landing hard in a mound of writhing, soft hard slender forms like lovers wrap around me – close over me Deep, deep in the darkness where eyes cannot see. Then a hot searing white pain from unseen forms swarming. Fangs in my cheek, throat, chest, fingers, feet, loins – suspended by teeth. The hole above is closing. The light is dying. A shriek from my chest: Father, see me. I have done these things. |
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3. | Rending | 04:16 | Show lyrics |
I’ve denied the Father – shaken of His guiding hand – for the resplendent light above which once brought blossoming now sears my very flesh. My back turned to you as if an offense to me – I, now savoring the scraps of the sons of men. The first taste of madness as the waters swell, and I emerge a new creature: a daemon in my own eyes refulgent and brilliant. From chaos to chaos, glory to glory, Lord to Lord, Father to father: an image and likeness divine. From spirit to matter, I have rent the veil. I can taste the sepulcher. Its gore is flowing myrrh; putrescence is fragrant oil. Let me kiss the face of the deep, formless and void. |
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4. | Charisma | 03:12 | Show lyrics |
I have glorified all forms of madness, turning the circle of the eye inward, elevating the bottom and ascending to the pit. Making blindness the illumination and death the anointing, the violent the beautiful, the murderer an apostle. Pain as a pleasure, rape a revelation, inversion ecstasy, wisdom in delusion. Inside the cube, a prison of insanity praised as planes shift and fatten out the mind. Open up the flesh, let the blood of the body out. Worship the emptiness in the eyes of a corpse. I confess to having tasted the blood of the children offered as they were to the hands of hell and to having taken pleasure in the screams of the innocent trapped in a house and burned to the ground. I have shown my firstborn son the visage of maleficence and offered him for burning while the seraphim stand aflame and aghast. This is my grief: that I am burdened by my atrocities but long for them still more. The black hole in my being that tears me apart is the same maniacal lust in my teeth to sink into flesh. |
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5. | Vision and Delirium | 03:22 | Show lyrics |
I am the hammer that smashes the wall. I am the wound that refuses to heal. I am the hatred of a son for his father. I am the father who kills his own son. I have come to surreal depths of darkness, the inescapable mouth of the vacuum, the crushing infinite black weight on every point of my life, infinity of pain on every cell of my body, pressure of infinite regression downward on every particle of my being. Nightmarish despair with no apparent cause, but beyond nightmares, profoundly immanent and more real than real in the midst of the death of reality. The looming faces of nameless beings who look and look and leer, and in the terror of absolute darkness, presences swarm around me (teeming chasm) and slash at me with the searing white pain of blank fire. And the looming torment of nonbeing that yet is forever unable to rid itself of the hum of consciousness lacking definite awareness – the nauseating torment of a blank white consciousness spilling forever into darkness. Oh, this terrible weight under a demonic void. In these last moments before I spill over the edge into the hole, Father, can You still hear my voice? |
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6. | The Corridor | 05:45 | Show lyrics |
But the light from the holy response is too bright and I will not see my own glory eclipsed nor my shame come into visible spectrum nor acknowledge my monstrosity as having been witnessed. I AM NOT. Who are You to reveal this truth of myself? Did You not put this pit before me? Anyone but I am guilty. Oh, how I long for You in the pit of my soul, but my mouth fills with bile in the glory of Your presence. Yes, my hands still clench the fetish that I fashioned from amorous matter into my own refection in the midst of internal darkness. You see it. And I can see the corridor before me extending away, my own life fading and love abandoned. But no, no, no! I will not. Reject that thought. Not Your way. I close my eyes and grind my teeth. When I look again, let the sight be gone and my own kingdom coming. Let only internal projections be reflected in the faces and the objects I see before me. I AM GOD. NAUGHT ELSE IS. Remove all greatness so the small can be great. Blind all eyes so they think I am king. Block out light; let my impotence be hidden. Destroy all minds so the fool seems a sage. Spread false hope that allegiance is rewarded. Magnify my weakness until it breeds fear. |
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7. | Lidless Eye | 05:15 | Show lyrics |
Birthing pains. Mind and body torn apart. Then a swirling vibrancy spilling into endless expanse, involuting into paradoxical void pregnant with my consciousness. I, the nucleus of this primordial dance, push forward to escape Nothing and to fill all in all until the boundaries that stretch of forever are filled. I am the ultimate preconceived, turning to myself for existential grounding. Separate entity from essence to enhance identity. To be sovereign, I must turn my soul into a cell forever locked away from the outside and ever turning inwardly. A new existence awaits where limitless possibilities converge in me and are projected outward again as I see fit. This path is no road, but stars! Countless stars! I expand and become ageless black. My hands, my feet dare to find an edge of reality, only finding more of myself. AM I NOT I AM? My eyes are closed. What is the morning star? My lidless eye. |
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8. | Coronation | 03:46 | Show lyrics |
Without the Axiom, cannot the proposition live on? I can cross the ontological gap. One plus one plus one until it equals infinity. One may divide without end and never equal zero, yet I will cross the everlasting plain until I come to the Highest Point that can never be reached. He with His logic holds that I can never reach the infinite peak, but I have filled the universe with my own vomit and will soar on that bilious wave higher than the spirit rises until emesis crests the throne-beyond-the-endless and I breach the divide of being separating second from the Primary. I will to cross the ontological chasm by my own power, breaking the threshold to the ever-rising throne, even though I must consume infinite energy as I approach. I want to sit on the throne even if I fail before it. I lust for the scepter even if a figure of mockery. I will be the cornerstone, even if the temple walls fall upon me. I bestow on myself the blessing. I am Mostly High, and I will hold the threads in place – or else climax as they tear in my fingers. I am now the first, the last, and the center. All eyes will be drawn to me, even as we collapse into fame. |
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9. | Aeon | 04:36 | Show lyrics |
Cut the restraint, sever all constituting parameters of existence if not of my own making. I can uphold them with my own being. The dissenter I will devour with my teeth. Mathematic boundaries I can wield, conceptual frameworks of my own life I can source as source. I am tetragrammar, body not spilling out, no no, brain not spill out, mind keep congeal. Syntax! I glory syntax! Weaver needle never waver, I structure glory all, stasis keep and stable master, Here a stone a rock a throne, sit and glory in myself. Here a throne already found, sit in place already stand, at foot of mountain in a ditch, mountain never needed climb. Gasping blood out of cells, bleeding out of spongy chest. Stars in sky black around bowing over, I the core! Planets, dust, and gas come worshipping, see god, see come praise. Chest inversion, tiny hole, pinpoint black exploding gate open up below my life? Inside center lifing place? Platelet ever falling inward? Flipping, turning, sliding inward. Gasping soul suck Life to life, space and stars and heavens falling, bowing drawn by growing hole in chest. Feed, feed, hole as life. Glory, in, and in the at, throning gloring, highest highess! Forever flipping hole in middle, blue and black and fat and fatting. Burning whiting blacking fat. Swallow whole stars out of reach. Swallow, swallow, swallow, swallow, swallow, swallow, blank. Spilling out. |
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38:47 |
Lo-Ruhamah
Members | |
---|---|
Band members | |
Jonathan Grant Griffin | Bass, Vocals (lead) |
Harry Frederick Pearson III | Drums, Piano, Vocals (additional) |
Matthew Mustain | Guitars, Vocals (backing) |
Miscellaneous staff | |
Samuel Durling | Logo |
Douglas Wilson | Artwork, Layout, Photography |
Jess Heugel | Photography |
Melissa Sweeten | Photography |
Brent Young (R.I.P. 2020) | Recording, Mixing, Mastering |
Tracks | |||
---|---|---|---|
1. | Burden of Reason | 06:10 | Show lyrics |
Where is my strength? Where is Thy light? "Strength Through Submission" Where is my strength? Where is Thy light? "Sight by Petition" Must I cower to be strong? "Have faith dear child. Look what your own hands have brought" Frail; they break under the weight. Never to know their own power. Never to see their own might. Crippled knees from years of prayer, and the "counsel" to my ears. Where is my strength? Where is Thy light? "Strength Through Submission" Where is my strength? Where is Thy light? "Sight by Petition" Pleased by cowards’ fawning cries. We bow our heads beneath Your might. Why have we been formed this way? "What is the clay to question it’s potter?" "Be still. Know that power is Mine. Faith. The answers will come in time." Why impart cognizine, only to blind us and bind us to faith? Power elusive. Strength unknown. Is pride truly the cause of the fall? Or could my own will be a wellspring of might? Could the will of man be the one source of life? |
|||
2. | The Birthright of Cain | 07:19 | Show lyrics |
Abandon has come with the early breath of dawn. To where has the long shadow fled, leaving such regret? “The yoke is easy; the burden is light.” Then why has Thy council, silent, made me an amort son? Silent and lifeless. Voiceless and nameless -- You were never there. Have I only been blinded and bound? Holding to a promise that died with each gloaming? Father, scripts are burning still with words divine. The absence of Your comfort will leave me supine. Yeshua, how I yearn for sight To glimpse into Your eyes. Still, there is no reply. Silent, vast, and lifeless. Dry is my tongue, and vain are my laments. For neither solace nor grace will come of this petition. Only the silence speaks to me wisdom. The Voiceless brings my callous heart to rest. Silent and lifeless. Voiceless and nameless -- You were never there. Have I only been blinded and bound? Holding to a promise that died with each gloaming? Father, scripts are burning still with words divine. The shadow of Your waning will leave me supine. Yeshua, how I yearn for sight To glimpse into Your eyes. Still, there is no reply. Silent, vast, and lifeless. “The yoke is easy, the burden is light.” Such words echo hollow, distant and fading. You were always there. You were never there. |
|||
3. | In Mourning’s Arms | 01:34 | instrumental |
(loading lyrics...) | |||
4. | He Awoke and Came to Me While I Was Sitting Shiva | 06:34 | Show lyrics |
As surely as my heart fails, my love will come to me. My doubt will not prevail; my death cannot prevent Him. Oh, cowardice, how you take from me. (Or is it strength?) I know not. Truly I concede this. How beautiful that His Spirit returns for me, As elation brawls for dominion of my soul. Now I recall how I thought I found Him sleeping. But He was only still, And His eyes were filling me with strength prepared for death. Oh, cowardice, how you take from me. (Or is it strength?) I know not. Truly I concede this. I forgot that His Spirit was more than habitation. But how he kills my doubt before the loss can claim my life. I know the Spirit lives even in the blackest places. His love still weighs heavily upon my soul. |
|||
21:37 |
Lo-Ruhamah
Members | |
---|---|
Original line-up | |
Band members | |
Jonathan Grant Griffin | Bass, Vocals (lead) |
Harry Frederick Pearson III | Drums, Piano, Vocals (additional) |
Matthew Mustain | Guitars, Vocals (backing) |
Miscellaneous staff | |
Douglas Wilson | Artwork, Layout, Photography |
Jess Heugel | Photography |
Melissa Sweeten | Photography |
Brent Young (R.I.P. 2020) | Recording, Mixing, Mastering |
Samuel Durling | Logo |
Tracks | |||
---|---|---|---|
1. | Burden of Reason | 06:10 | Show lyrics |
Where is my strength? Where is Thy light? "Strength Through Submission" Where is my strength? Where is Thy light? "Sight by Petition" Must I cower to be strong? "Have faith dear child. Look what your own hands have brought" Frail; they break under the weight. Never to know their own power. Never to see their own might. Crippled knees from years of prayer, and the "counsel" to my ears. Where is my strength? Where is Thy light? "Strength Through Submission" Where is my strength? Where is Thy light? "Sight by Petition" Pleased by cowards’ fawning cries. We bow our heads beneath Your might. Why have we been formed this way? "What is the clay to question it’s potter?" "Be still. Know that power is Mine. Faith. The answers will come in time." Why impart cognizine, only to blind us and bind us to faith? Power elusive. Strength unknown. Is pride truly the cause of the fall? Or could my own will be a wellspring of might? Could the will of man be the one source of life? |
|||
2. | The Birthright of Cain | 07:19 | Show lyrics |
Abandon has come with the early breath of dawn. To where has the long shadow fled, leaving such regret? “The yoke is easy; the burden is light.” Then why has Thy council, silent, made me an amort son? Silent and lifeless. Voiceless and nameless -- You were never there. Have I only been blinded and bound? Holding to a promise that died with each gloaming? Father, scripts are burning still with words divine. The absence of Your comfort will leave me supine. Yeshua, how I yearn for sight To glimpse into Your eyes. Still, there is no reply. Silent, vast, and lifeless. Dry is my tongue, and vain are my laments. For neither solace nor grace will come of this petition. Only the silence speaks to me wisdom. The Voiceless brings my callous heart to rest. Silent and lifeless. Voiceless and nameless -- You were never there. Have I only been blinded and bound? Holding to a promise that died with each gloaming? Father, scripts are burning still with words divine. The shadow of Your waning will leave me supine. Yeshua, how I yearn for sight To glimpse into Your eyes. Still, there is no reply. Silent, vast, and lifeless. “The yoke is easy, the burden is light.” Such words echo hollow, distant and fading. You were always there. You were never there. |
|||
3. | In Mourning’s Arms | 01:34 | instrumental |
(loading lyrics...) | |||
4. | He Awoke and Came to Me While I Was Sitting Shiva | 06:34 | Show lyrics |
As surely as my heart fails, my love will come to me. My doubt will not prevail; my death cannot prevent Him. Oh, cowardice, how you take from me. (Or is it strength?) I know not. Truly I concede this. How beautiful that His Spirit returns for me, As elation brawls for dominion of my soul. Now I recall how I thought I found Him sleeping. But He was only still, And His eyes were filling me with strength prepared for death. Oh, cowardice, how you take from me. (Or is it strength?) I know not. Truly I concede this. I forgot that His Spirit was more than habitation. But how he kills my doubt before the loss can claim my life. I know the Spirit lives even in the blackest places. His love still weighs heavily upon my soul. |
|||
21:37 |
The Glory of God
Members | |
---|---|
Band members | |
Jonathan Grant Griffin | Bass, Vocals (lead) |
Harry Frederick Pearson III | Drums, Piano, Vocals (additional) |
Matthew Mustain | Guitars, Vocals (backing) |
Miscellaneous staff | |
Eric Clinton Anderson | Artwork |
Rob Colwell | Mastering |
Brent Young (R.I.P. 2020) | Recording, Mixing, Producer |
Tracks | |||
---|---|---|---|
1. | The Cloud of My Soul | 02:19 | instrumental |
(loading lyrics...) | |||
2. | As We Walk | 06:50 | Show lyrics |
When have You called me child? When have You loved me? How can a father call his sentiment love when he stares so blankly from where he hides? Every thought in the cloud of my soul heavily hopes that You will prove to be real. All of my thoughts are tinted with longing, with yearning for You to reach me. I don’t want to find You--I want You to join me. I dream that we meet in the shaded spell of dusk as the trees glow with the lowering light of the red sun and rising moon when the Earth cools like the final breeze of morning. We meet as we walk on grass and soft leaves, and finally I know Your love because You have allowed me to see and to hold it. When have You loved me? I will know when You answer my call... |
|||
3. | Rose & Ivory | 10:09 | Show lyrics |
We remember Your name and the colors of Your breath (rose and ivory) and the taste of Your words in our mouths and the way it felt to stand in the steps of an unseen Spirit. And on the edges of sleep, we swear we can still see the shape of Your silhouette. Peripheral God, You dance at the corners of sight as we walk past You on a dead Earth. |
|||
4. | Shear-Jasub | 11:00 | Show lyrics |
If God will be silent, then so will His servant, for His lead is guiding the path I have chosen.... But what were the choices that brought me to birth? What human would claim we requested derision, or that we requested our hope to be faith? My eyes do not need menial validation, but faith needs a rock or a reason to live. Still, though I am aching for Wisdom, I have not severed the ties that retain me. I will not forget that the wise are blind. I wait for the Spirit we have still yet to know. In silence I wait beneath celestial sanctum, and if He comes, then I will speak again. (For then Your remnant shall return...) |
|||
5. | Torrents | 11:34 | Show lyrics |
In the writhing sea of Your love, I am swallowed. Black waves like starless skies wrap tightly around my body. Black waves: Your presence. And the roar of the breaking tide: Your voice (Yahweh) Drown me--I am lost without You Drown me--I lose myself in You The sea is ceaseless and the shore is gone, so I sink into Your deepness-- into Your depths am drawn. I breathe to die, so drown me. |
|||
6. | What Lines Reveal | 12:01 | Show lyrics |
Beckoned by the shadows, their familiar whispering of temptation (the ancient scourge) draws me. In a fallen state, where the sun grows cold, the last shafts of light close in around my feet. Hope is absent from this place--faith but a memory. Enticing shapes taunt with sweet notions, bidding me accept them. "Whom do you serve?" My mind retreats from such inquiries. "You are condemned; the former things are lost." Descend into the depths; the lines reveal the path of tears. Surely help will come; surely I will not be left. I pray my silent cries are heard, that He will come and lift me from my plight. The glory of God is found in pain, for it is the means by which He draws us near, unless we see ego behind His movements. Then a skyward glance comforts not. The world shrinks, and the windows close. This is my lot: human frailty, the kin of sadness. |
|||
7. | Regret Not This Love | 08:31 | Show lyrics |
Hope guides the days but so does despair, And You have left me with both (So my limitation is complete). I will not seek the end, for I know none exists. No beginning means no end: There is only existence. I am only a pulse, an atom in the ebb, And a form in the flow. When the sunlight recedes and the moon burns white I fell life cycle around me. Emptiness and comfort converge, And I see they are inseperable. How is life both nothing and beautiful? There is one love I will never regret Though my understanding is strained. I must strengthen myself to be content In the cutting winds of confusion. How will I trust? But how can I doubt? |
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01:02:24 |
The Glory of God
Members | |
---|---|
Original line-up | |
Band members | |
Jonathan Grant Griffin | Bass, Vocals (lead) |
Harry Frederick Pearson III | Drums, Piano, Vocals (additional) |
Matthew Mustain | Guitars, Vocals (backing) |
Miscellaneous staff | |
Rob Colwell | Mastering |
Brent Young (R.I.P. 2020) | Recording, Mixing, Producer |
Eric Clinton Anderson | Artwork |
Tracks | |||
---|---|---|---|
1. | The Cloud of My Soul | 02:19 | instrumental |
(loading lyrics...) | |||
2. | As We Walk | 06:50 | Show lyrics |
When have You called me child? When have You loved me? How can a father call his sentiment love when he stares so blankly from where he hides? Every thought in the cloud of my soul heavily hopes that You will prove to be real. All of my thoughts are tinted with longing, with yearning for You to reach me. I don’t want to find You--I want You to join me. I dream that we meet in the shaded spell of dusk as the trees glow with the lowering light of the red sun and rising moon when the Earth cools like the final breeze of morning. We meet as we walk on grass and soft leaves, and finally I know Your love because You have allowed me to see and to hold it. When have You loved me? I will know when You answer my call... |
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3. | Rose & Ivory | 10:09 | Show lyrics |
We remember Your name and the colors of Your breath (rose and ivory) and the taste of Your words in our mouths and the way it felt to stand in the steps of an unseen Spirit. And on the edges of sleep, we swear we can still see the shape of Your silhouette. Peripheral God, You dance at the corners of sight as we walk past You on a dead Earth. |
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4. | Shear-Jasub | 11:00 | Show lyrics |
If God will be silent, then so will His servant, for His lead is guiding the path I have chosen.... But what were the choices that brought me to birth? What human would claim we requested derision, or that we requested our hope to be faith? My eyes do not need menial validation, but faith needs a rock or a reason to live. Still, though I am aching for Wisdom, I have not severed the ties that retain me. I will not forget that the wise are blind. I wait for the Spirit we have still yet to know. In silence I wait beneath celestial sanctum, and if He comes, then I will speak again. (For then Your remnant shall return...) |
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5. | Torrents | 11:34 | Show lyrics |
In the writhing sea of Your love, I am swallowed. Black waves like starless skies wrap tightly around my body. Black waves: Your presence. And the roar of the breaking tide: Your voice (Yahweh) Drown me--I am lost without You Drown me--I lose myself in You The sea is ceaseless and the shore is gone, so I sink into Your deepness-- into Your depths am drawn. I breathe to die, so drown me. |
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6. | What Lines Reveal | 12:01 | Show lyrics |
Beckoned by the shadows, their familiar whispering of temptation (the ancient scourge) draws me. In a fallen state, where the sun grows cold, the last shafts of light close in around my feet. Hope is absent from this place--faith but a memory. Enticing shapes taunt with sweet notions, bidding me accept them. "Whom do you serve?" My mind retreats from such inquiries. "You are condemned; the former things are lost." Descend into the depths; the lines reveal the path of tears. Surely help will come; surely I will not be left. I pray my silent cries are heard, that He will come and lift me from my plight. The glory of God is found in pain, for it is the means by which He draws us near, unless we see ego behind His movements. Then a skyward glance comforts not. The world shrinks, and the windows close. This is my lot: human frailty, the kin of sadness. |
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7. | Regret Not This Love | 08:31 | Show lyrics |
Hope guides the days but so does despair, And You have left me with both (So my limitation is complete). I will not seek the end, for I know none exists. No beginning means no end: There is only existence. I am only a pulse, an atom in the ebb, And a form in the flow. When the sunlight recedes and the moon burns white I fell life cycle around me. Emptiness and comfort converge, And I see they are inseperable. How is life both nothing and beautiful? There is one love I will never regret Though my understanding is strained. I must strengthen myself to be content In the cutting winds of confusion. How will I trust? But how can I doubt? |
|||
01:02:24 |
Anointing
Members | |
---|---|
Band members | |
Jonathan Grant Griffin | Bass, Vocals |
Harry Frederick Pearson III | Drums |
Matthew Mustain | Guitars |
Miscellaneous staff | |
Damian Herring | Mixing, Mastering |
Francesco Gemelli | Design |
Elijah Gwhedhú Tamu | Cover art, Artwork |
Julie Griffin | Photography |
Michael Hylton | Photography |
Rachel Pearson | Photography |
Tracks | |||
---|---|---|---|
1. | Mouth | 04:17 | Show lyrics |
In the beginning I Was. And then I was Not, for I opened the door when death was calling. The sweet lure of a bitter taste. The mysterious lure of the faint taste of blood. The hypnotic pulse of a bright spot of light deep within the emptiness. And then the intoxicating delirium to wield a cosmic darkness. Out of the lure – a mouth full of blood. In the face of the light – teeth. Out of the wielding – being wielded and invaded. Teeth in my throat, poison-clouded thoughts, gasping for death. In the chasm, I am the Beast, and the Beast is within me. |
|||
2. | Sibilant Chorus | 04:18 | Show lyrics |
Against all wisdom and principle of life, I listened to a voice I ought never have allowed to speak. On the edge of a pit, I denied my Father’s voice and looked into the hole where I was told not to look. I heard the vipers hissing while yet far away, and drawing close, I called myself Master. Standing over the pit, the hiss rising to a feverish pitch: a symphony of grandeur. A mockery of death. A soulless chittering voice speaking in octaves all at once. Indistinguishable tongues of depravity singing the song of sensual emptiness. A glorious dream lifting up from a knot of serpents far below, hidden in the darkness. Leaning out, leaning in. Straining eyes searching for secrets. Ears entranced with amorous sounds. Leaning far, falling in. Landing hard in a mound of writhing, soft hard slender forms like lovers wrap around me – close over me Deep, deep in the darkness where eyes cannot see. Then a hot searing white pain from unseen forms swarming. Fangs in my cheek, throat, chest, fingers, feet, loins – suspended by teeth. The hole above is closing. The light is dying. A shriek from my chest: Father, see me. I have done these things. |
|||
3. | Rending | 04:16 | Show lyrics |
I’ve denied the Father – shaken of His guiding hand – for the resplendent light above which once brought blossoming now sears my very flesh. My back turned to you as if an offense to me – I, now savoring the scraps of the sons of men. The first taste of madness as the waters swell, and I emerge a new creature: a daemon in my own eyes refulgent and brilliant. From chaos to chaos, glory to glory, Lord to Lord, Father to father: an image and likeness divine. From spirit to matter, I have rent the veil. I can taste the sepulcher. Its gore is flowing myrrh; putrescence is fragrant oil. Let me kiss the face of the deep, formless and void. |
|||
4. | Charisma | 03:12 | Show lyrics |
I have glorified all forms of madness, turning the circle of the eye inward, elevating the bottom and ascending to the pit. Making blindness the illumination and death the anointing, the violent the beautiful, the murderer an apostle. Pain as a pleasure, rape a revelation, inversion ecstasy, wisdom in delusion. Inside the cube, a prison of insanity praised as planes shift and fatten out the mind. Open up the flesh, let the blood of the body out. Worship the emptiness in the eyes of a corpse. I confess to having tasted the blood of the children offered as they were to the hands of hell and to having taken pleasure in the screams of the innocent trapped in a house and burned to the ground. I have shown my firstborn son the visage of maleficence and offered him for burning while the seraphim stand aflame and aghast. This is my grief: that I am burdened by my atrocities but long for them still more. The black hole in my being that tears me apart is the same maniacal lust in my teeth to sink into flesh. |
|||
5. | Vision and Delirium | 03:22 | Show lyrics |
I am the hammer that smashes the wall. I am the wound that refuses to heal. I am the hatred of a son for his father. I am the father who kills his own son. I have come to surreal depths of darkness, the inescapable mouth of the vacuum, the crushing infinite black weight on every point of my life, infinity of pain on every cell of my body, pressure of infinite regression downward on every particle of my being. Nightmarish despair with no apparent cause, but beyond nightmares, profoundly immanent and more real than real in the midst of the death of reality. The looming faces of nameless beings who look and look and leer, and in the terror of absolute darkness, presences swarm around me (teeming chasm) and slash at me with the searing white pain of blank fire. And the looming torment of nonbeing that yet is forever unable to rid itself of the hum of consciousness lacking definite awareness – the nauseating torment of a blank white consciousness spilling forever into darkness. Oh, this terrible weight under a demonic void. In these last moments before I spill over the edge into the hole, Father, can You still hear my voice? |
|||
6. | The Corridor | 05:45 | Show lyrics |
But the light from the holy response is too bright and I will not see my own glory eclipsed nor my shame come into visible spectrum nor acknowledge my monstrosity as having been witnessed. I AM NOT. Who are You to reveal this truth of myself? Did You not put this pit before me? Anyone but I am guilty. Oh, how I long for You in the pit of my soul, but my mouth fills with bile in the glory of Your presence. Yes, my hands still clench the fetish that I fashioned from amorous matter into my own refection in the midst of internal darkness. You see it. And I can see the corridor before me extending away, my own life fading and love abandoned. But no, no, no! I will not. Reject that thought. Not Your way. I close my eyes and grind my teeth. When I look again, let the sight be gone and my own kingdom coming. Let only internal projections be reflected in the faces and the objects I see before me. I AM GOD. NAUGHT ELSE IS. Remove all greatness so the small can be great. Blind all eyes so they think I am king. Block out light; let my impotence be hidden. Destroy all minds so the fool seems a sage. Spread false hope that allegiance is rewarded. Magnify my weakness until it breeds fear. |
|||
7. | Lidless Eye | 05:15 | Show lyrics |
Birthing pains. Mind and body torn apart. Then a swirling vibrancy spilling into endless expanse, involuting into paradoxical void pregnant with my consciousness. I, the nucleus of this primordial dance, push forward to escape Nothing and to fill all in all until the boundaries that stretch of forever are filled. I am the ultimate preconceived, turning to myself for existential grounding. Separate entity from essence to enhance identity. To be sovereign, I must turn my soul into a cell forever locked away from the outside and ever turning inwardly. A new existence awaits where limitless possibilities converge in me and are projected outward again as I see fit. This path is no road, but stars! Countless stars! I expand and become ageless black. My hands, my feet dare to find an edge of reality, only finding more of myself. AM I NOT I AM? My eyes are closed. What is the morning star? My lidless eye. |
|||
8. | Coronation | 03:46 | Show lyrics |
Without the Axiom, cannot the proposition live on? I can cross the ontological gap. One plus one plus one until it equals infinity. One may divide without end and never equal zero, yet I will cross the everlasting plain until I come to the Highest Point that can never be reached. He with His logic holds that I can never reach the infinite peak, but I have filled the universe with my own vomit and will soar on that bilious wave higher than the spirit rises until emesis crests the throne-beyond-the-endless and I breach the divide of being separating second from the Primary. I will to cross the ontological chasm by my own power, breaking the threshold to the ever-rising throne, even though I must consume infinite energy as I approach. I want to sit on the throne even if I fail before it. I lust for the scepter even if a figure of mockery. I will be the cornerstone, even if the temple walls fall upon me. I bestow on myself the blessing. I am Mostly High, and I will hold the threads in place – or else climax as they tear in my fingers. I am now the first, the last, and the center. All eyes will be drawn to me, even as we collapse into fame. |
|||
9. | Aeon | 04:36 | Show lyrics |
Cut the restraint, sever all constituting parameters of existence if not of my own making. I can uphold them with my own being. The dissenter I will devour with my teeth. Mathematic boundaries I can wield, conceptual frameworks of my own life I can source as source. I am tetragrammar, body not spilling out, no no, brain not spill out, mind keep congeal. Syntax! I glory syntax! Weaver needle never waver, I structure glory all, stasis keep and stable master, Here a stone a rock a throne, sit and glory in myself. Here a throne already found, sit in place already stand, at foot of mountain in a ditch, mountain never needed climb. Gasping blood out of cells, bleeding out of spongy chest. Stars in sky black around bowing over, I the core! Planets, dust, and gas come worshipping, see god, see come praise. Chest inversion, tiny hole, pinpoint black exploding gate open up below my life? Inside center lifing place? Platelet ever falling inward? Flipping, turning, sliding inward. Gasping soul suck Life to life, space and stars and heavens falling, bowing drawn by growing hole in chest. Feed, feed, hole as life. Glory, in, and in the at, throning gloring, highest highess! Forever flipping hole in middle, blue and black and fat and fatting. Burning whiting blacking fat. Swallow whole stars out of reach. Swallow, swallow, swallow, swallow, swallow, swallow, blank. Spilling out. |
|||
38:47 |
Anointing
Members | |
---|---|
Original line-up | |
Band members | |
Jonathan Grant Griffin | Bass, Vocals |
Harry Frederick Pearson III | Drums |
Matthew Mustain | Guitars |
Miscellaneous staff | |
Elijah Gwhedhú Tamu | Artwork, Cover art |
Julie Griffin | Photography |
Michael Hylton | Photography |
Rachel Pearson | Photography |
Damian Herring | Mixing, Mastering |
Francesco Gemelli | Design |
Tracks | |||
---|---|---|---|
1. | Mouth | 04:17 | Show lyrics |
In the beginning I Was. And then I was Not, for I opened the door when death was calling. The sweet lure of a bitter taste. The mysterious lure of the faint taste of blood. The hypnotic pulse of a bright spot of light deep within the emptiness. And then the intoxicating delirium to wield a cosmic darkness. Out of the lure – a mouth full of blood. In the face of the light – teeth. Out of the wielding – being wielded and invaded. Teeth in my throat, poison-clouded thoughts, gasping for death. In the chasm, I am the Beast, and the Beast is within me. |
|||
2. | Sibilant Chorus | 04:18 | Show lyrics |
Against all wisdom and principle of life, I listened to a voice I ought never have allowed to speak. On the edge of a pit, I denied my Father’s voice and looked into the hole where I was told not to look. I heard the vipers hissing while yet far away, and drawing close, I called myself Master. Standing over the pit, the hiss rising to a feverish pitch: a symphony of grandeur. A mockery of death. A soulless chittering voice speaking in octaves all at once. Indistinguishable tongues of depravity singing the song of sensual emptiness. A glorious dream lifting up from a knot of serpents far below, hidden in the darkness. Leaning out, leaning in. Straining eyes searching for secrets. Ears entranced with amorous sounds. Leaning far, falling in. Landing hard in a mound of writhing, soft hard slender forms like lovers wrap around me – close over me Deep, deep in the darkness where eyes cannot see. Then a hot searing white pain from unseen forms swarming. Fangs in my cheek, throat, chest, fingers, feet, loins – suspended by teeth. The hole above is closing. The light is dying. A shriek from my chest: Father, see me. I have done these things. |
|||
3. | Rending | 04:16 | Show lyrics |
I’ve denied the Father – shaken of His guiding hand – for the resplendent light above which once brought blossoming now sears my very flesh. My back turned to you as if an offense to me – I, now savoring the scraps of the sons of men. The first taste of madness as the waters swell, and I emerge a new creature: a daemon in my own eyes refulgent and brilliant. From chaos to chaos, glory to glory, Lord to Lord, Father to father: an image and likeness divine. From spirit to matter, I have rent the veil. I can taste the sepulcher. Its gore is flowing myrrh; putrescence is fragrant oil. Let me kiss the face of the deep, formless and void. |
|||
4. | Charisma | 03:12 | Show lyrics |
I have glorified all forms of madness, turning the circle of the eye inward, elevating the bottom and ascending to the pit. Making blindness the illumination and death the anointing, the violent the beautiful, the murderer an apostle. Pain as a pleasure, rape a revelation, inversion ecstasy, wisdom in delusion. Inside the cube, a prison of insanity praised as planes shift and fatten out the mind. Open up the flesh, let the blood of the body out. Worship the emptiness in the eyes of a corpse. I confess to having tasted the blood of the children offered as they were to the hands of hell and to having taken pleasure in the screams of the innocent trapped in a house and burned to the ground. I have shown my firstborn son the visage of maleficence and offered him for burning while the seraphim stand aflame and aghast. This is my grief: that I am burdened by my atrocities but long for them still more. The black hole in my being that tears me apart is the same maniacal lust in my teeth to sink into flesh. |
|||
5. | Vision and Delirium | 03:22 | Show lyrics |
I am the hammer that smashes the wall. I am the wound that refuses to heal. I am the hatred of a son for his father. I am the father who kills his own son. I have come to surreal depths of darkness, the inescapable mouth of the vacuum, the crushing infinite black weight on every point of my life, infinity of pain on every cell of my body, pressure of infinite regression downward on every particle of my being. Nightmarish despair with no apparent cause, but beyond nightmares, profoundly immanent and more real than real in the midst of the death of reality. The looming faces of nameless beings who look and look and leer, and in the terror of absolute darkness, presences swarm around me (teeming chasm) and slash at me with the searing white pain of blank fire. And the looming torment of nonbeing that yet is forever unable to rid itself of the hum of consciousness lacking definite awareness – the nauseating torment of a blank white consciousness spilling forever into darkness. Oh, this terrible weight under a demonic void. In these last moments before I spill over the edge into the hole, Father, can You still hear my voice? |
|||
6. | The Corridor | 05:45 | Show lyrics |
But the light from the holy response is too bright and I will not see my own glory eclipsed nor my shame come into visible spectrum nor acknowledge my monstrosity as having been witnessed. I AM NOT. Who are You to reveal this truth of myself? Did You not put this pit before me? Anyone but I am guilty. Oh, how I long for You in the pit of my soul, but my mouth fills with bile in the glory of Your presence. Yes, my hands still clench the fetish that I fashioned from amorous matter into my own refection in the midst of internal darkness. You see it. And I can see the corridor before me extending away, my own life fading and love abandoned. But no, no, no! I will not. Reject that thought. Not Your way. I close my eyes and grind my teeth. When I look again, let the sight be gone and my own kingdom coming. Let only internal projections be reflected in the faces and the objects I see before me. I AM GOD. NAUGHT ELSE IS. Remove all greatness so the small can be great. Blind all eyes so they think I am king. Block out light; let my impotence be hidden. Destroy all minds so the fool seems a sage. Spread false hope that allegiance is rewarded. Magnify my weakness until it breeds fear. |
|||
7. | Lidless Eye | 05:15 | Show lyrics |
Birthing pains. Mind and body torn apart. Then a swirling vibrancy spilling into endless expanse, involuting into paradoxical void pregnant with my consciousness. I, the nucleus of this primordial dance, push forward to escape Nothing and to fill all in all until the boundaries that stretch of forever are filled. I am the ultimate preconceived, turning to myself for existential grounding. Separate entity from essence to enhance identity. To be sovereign, I must turn my soul into a cell forever locked away from the outside and ever turning inwardly. A new existence awaits where limitless possibilities converge in me and are projected outward again as I see fit. This path is no road, but stars! Countless stars! I expand and become ageless black. My hands, my feet dare to find an edge of reality, only finding more of myself. AM I NOT I AM? My eyes are closed. What is the morning star? My lidless eye. |
|||
8. | Coronation | 03:46 | Show lyrics |
Without the Axiom, cannot the proposition live on? I can cross the ontological gap. One plus one plus one until it equals infinity. One may divide without end and never equal zero, yet I will cross the everlasting plain until I come to the Highest Point that can never be reached. He with His logic holds that I can never reach the infinite peak, but I have filled the universe with my own vomit and will soar on that bilious wave higher than the spirit rises until emesis crests the throne-beyond-the-endless and I breach the divide of being separating second from the Primary. I will to cross the ontological chasm by my own power, breaking the threshold to the ever-rising throne, even though I must consume infinite energy as I approach. I want to sit on the throne even if I fail before it. I lust for the scepter even if a figure of mockery. I will be the cornerstone, even if the temple walls fall upon me. I bestow on myself the blessing. I am Mostly High, and I will hold the threads in place – or else climax as they tear in my fingers. I am now the first, the last, and the center. All eyes will be drawn to me, even as we collapse into fame. |
|||
9. | Aeon | 04:36 | Show lyrics |
Cut the restraint, sever all constituting parameters of existence if not of my own making. I can uphold them with my own being. The dissenter I will devour with my teeth. Mathematic boundaries I can wield, conceptual frameworks of my own life I can source as source. I am tetragrammar, body not spilling out, no no, brain not spill out, mind keep congeal. Syntax! I glory syntax! Weaver needle never waver, I structure glory all, stasis keep and stable master, Here a stone a rock a throne, sit and glory in myself. Here a throne already found, sit in place already stand, at foot of mountain in a ditch, mountain never needed climb. Gasping blood out of cells, bleeding out of spongy chest. Stars in sky black around bowing over, I the core! Planets, dust, and gas come worshipping, see god, see come praise. Chest inversion, tiny hole, pinpoint black exploding gate open up below my life? Inside center lifing place? Platelet ever falling inward? Flipping, turning, sliding inward. Gasping soul suck Life to life, space and stars and heavens falling, bowing drawn by growing hole in chest. Feed, feed, hole as life. Glory, in, and in the at, throning gloring, highest highess! Forever flipping hole in middle, blue and black and fat and fatting. Burning whiting blacking fat. Swallow whole stars out of reach. Swallow, swallow, swallow, swallow, swallow, swallow, blank. Spilling out. |
|||
38:47 |
Anointing
Members | |
---|---|
Original line-up | |
Band members | |
Jonathan Grant Griffin | Bass, Vocals |
Harry Frederick Pearson III | Drums |
Matthew Mustain | Guitars |
Miscellaneous staff | |
Elijah Gwhedhú Tamu | Artwork, Cover art |
Julie Griffin | Photography |
Michael Hylton | Photography |
Rachel Pearson | Photography |
Damian Herring | Mixing, Mastering |
Francesco Gemelli | Design |
Tracks | |||
---|---|---|---|
1. | Mouth | 04:17 | Show lyrics |
In the beginning I Was. And then I was Not, for I opened the door when death was calling. The sweet lure of a bitter taste. The mysterious lure of the faint taste of blood. The hypnotic pulse of a bright spot of light deep within the emptiness. And then the intoxicating delirium to wield a cosmic darkness. Out of the lure – a mouth full of blood. In the face of the light – teeth. Out of the wielding – being wielded and invaded. Teeth in my throat, poison-clouded thoughts, gasping for death. In the chasm, I am the Beast, and the Beast is within me. |
|||
2. | Sibilant Chorus | 04:18 | Show lyrics |
Against all wisdom and principle of life, I listened to a voice I ought never have allowed to speak. On the edge of a pit, I denied my Father’s voice and looked into the hole where I was told not to look. I heard the vipers hissing while yet far away, and drawing close, I called myself Master. Standing over the pit, the hiss rising to a feverish pitch: a symphony of grandeur. A mockery of death. A soulless chittering voice speaking in octaves all at once. Indistinguishable tongues of depravity singing the song of sensual emptiness. A glorious dream lifting up from a knot of serpents far below, hidden in the darkness. Leaning out, leaning in. Straining eyes searching for secrets. Ears entranced with amorous sounds. Leaning far, falling in. Landing hard in a mound of writhing, soft hard slender forms like lovers wrap around me – close over me Deep, deep in the darkness where eyes cannot see. Then a hot searing white pain from unseen forms swarming. Fangs in my cheek, throat, chest, fingers, feet, loins – suspended by teeth. The hole above is closing. The light is dying. A shriek from my chest: Father, see me. I have done these things. |
|||
3. | Rending | 04:16 | Show lyrics |
I’ve denied the Father – shaken of His guiding hand – for the resplendent light above which once brought blossoming now sears my very flesh. My back turned to you as if an offense to me – I, now savoring the scraps of the sons of men. The first taste of madness as the waters swell, and I emerge a new creature: a daemon in my own eyes refulgent and brilliant. From chaos to chaos, glory to glory, Lord to Lord, Father to father: an image and likeness divine. From spirit to matter, I have rent the veil. I can taste the sepulcher. Its gore is flowing myrrh; putrescence is fragrant oil. Let me kiss the face of the deep, formless and void. |
|||
4. | Charisma | 03:12 | Show lyrics |
I have glorified all forms of madness, turning the circle of the eye inward, elevating the bottom and ascending to the pit. Making blindness the illumination and death the anointing, the violent the beautiful, the murderer an apostle. Pain as a pleasure, rape a revelation, inversion ecstasy, wisdom in delusion. Inside the cube, a prison of insanity praised as planes shift and fatten out the mind. Open up the flesh, let the blood of the body out. Worship the emptiness in the eyes of a corpse. I confess to having tasted the blood of the children offered as they were to the hands of hell and to having taken pleasure in the screams of the innocent trapped in a house and burned to the ground. I have shown my firstborn son the visage of maleficence and offered him for burning while the seraphim stand aflame and aghast. This is my grief: that I am burdened by my atrocities but long for them still more. The black hole in my being that tears me apart is the same maniacal lust in my teeth to sink into flesh. |
|||
5. | Vision and Delirium | 03:22 | Show lyrics |
I am the hammer that smashes the wall. I am the wound that refuses to heal. I am the hatred of a son for his father. I am the father who kills his own son. I have come to surreal depths of darkness, the inescapable mouth of the vacuum, the crushing infinite black weight on every point of my life, infinity of pain on every cell of my body, pressure of infinite regression downward on every particle of my being. Nightmarish despair with no apparent cause, but beyond nightmares, profoundly immanent and more real than real in the midst of the death of reality. The looming faces of nameless beings who look and look and leer, and in the terror of absolute darkness, presences swarm around me (teeming chasm) and slash at me with the searing white pain of blank fire. And the looming torment of nonbeing that yet is forever unable to rid itself of the hum of consciousness lacking definite awareness – the nauseating torment of a blank white consciousness spilling forever into darkness. Oh, this terrible weight under a demonic void. In these last moments before I spill over the edge into the hole, Father, can You still hear my voice? |
|||
6. | The Corridor | 05:45 | Show lyrics |
But the light from the holy response is too bright and I will not see my own glory eclipsed nor my shame come into visible spectrum nor acknowledge my monstrosity as having been witnessed. I AM NOT. Who are You to reveal this truth of myself? Did You not put this pit before me? Anyone but I am guilty. Oh, how I long for You in the pit of my soul, but my mouth fills with bile in the glory of Your presence. Yes, my hands still clench the fetish that I fashioned from amorous matter into my own refection in the midst of internal darkness. You see it. And I can see the corridor before me extending away, my own life fading and love abandoned. But no, no, no! I will not. Reject that thought. Not Your way. I close my eyes and grind my teeth. When I look again, let the sight be gone and my own kingdom coming. Let only internal projections be reflected in the faces and the objects I see before me. I AM GOD. NAUGHT ELSE IS. Remove all greatness so the small can be great. Blind all eyes so they think I am king. Block out light; let my impotence be hidden. Destroy all minds so the fool seems a sage. Spread false hope that allegiance is rewarded. Magnify my weakness until it breeds fear. |
|||
7. | Lidless Eye | 05:15 | Show lyrics |
Birthing pains. Mind and body torn apart. Then a swirling vibrancy spilling into endless expanse, involuting into paradoxical void pregnant with my consciousness. I, the nucleus of this primordial dance, push forward to escape Nothing and to fill all in all until the boundaries that stretch of forever are filled. I am the ultimate preconceived, turning to myself for existential grounding. Separate entity from essence to enhance identity. To be sovereign, I must turn my soul into a cell forever locked away from the outside and ever turning inwardly. A new existence awaits where limitless possibilities converge in me and are projected outward again as I see fit. This path is no road, but stars! Countless stars! I expand and become ageless black. My hands, my feet dare to find an edge of reality, only finding more of myself. AM I NOT I AM? My eyes are closed. What is the morning star? My lidless eye. |
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8. | Coronation | 03:46 | Show lyrics |
Without the Axiom, cannot the proposition live on? I can cross the ontological gap. One plus one plus one until it equals infinity. One may divide without end and never equal zero, yet I will cross the everlasting plain until I come to the Highest Point that can never be reached. He with His logic holds that I can never reach the infinite peak, but I have filled the universe with my own vomit and will soar on that bilious wave higher than the spirit rises until emesis crests the throne-beyond-the-endless and I breach the divide of being separating second from the Primary. I will to cross the ontological chasm by my own power, breaking the threshold to the ever-rising throne, even though I must consume infinite energy as I approach. I want to sit on the throne even if I fail before it. I lust for the scepter even if a figure of mockery. I will be the cornerstone, even if the temple walls fall upon me. I bestow on myself the blessing. I am Mostly High, and I will hold the threads in place – or else climax as they tear in my fingers. I am now the first, the last, and the center. All eyes will be drawn to me, even as we collapse into fame. |
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9. | Aeon | 04:36 | Show lyrics |
Cut the restraint, sever all constituting parameters of existence if not of my own making. I can uphold them with my own being. The dissenter I will devour with my teeth. Mathematic boundaries I can wield, conceptual frameworks of my own life I can source as source. I am tetragrammar, body not spilling out, no no, brain not spill out, mind keep congeal. Syntax! I glory syntax! Weaver needle never waver, I structure glory all, stasis keep and stable master, Here a stone a rock a throne, sit and glory in myself. Here a throne already found, sit in place already stand, at foot of mountain in a ditch, mountain never needed climb. Gasping blood out of cells, bleeding out of spongy chest. Stars in sky black around bowing over, I the core! Planets, dust, and gas come worshipping, see god, see come praise. Chest inversion, tiny hole, pinpoint black exploding gate open up below my life? Inside center lifing place? Platelet ever falling inward? Flipping, turning, sliding inward. Gasping soul suck Life to life, space and stars and heavens falling, bowing drawn by growing hole in chest. Feed, feed, hole as life. Glory, in, and in the at, throning gloring, highest highess! Forever flipping hole in middle, blue and black and fat and fatting. Burning whiting blacking fat. Swallow whole stars out of reach. Swallow, swallow, swallow, swallow, swallow, swallow, blank. Spilling out. |
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38:47 |
Band ascii art
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